7 Reasons Why I Wanted to Stop Playing Too Human
September 17, 2008 | 4:41 PM PST
By the time that I saw Too Human's credits rolling, I had realized that I had forced myself to play through the game -- a truth that speaks volumes about the design of Silicon Knight's action-RPG.
This is not a "Let's Hate on Too Human" post. I am writing this because I have genuinely wanted to verbalize some of the reasons that I seriously wanted to put the controller down while playing through Too Human and never pick it up again. The game has been out for a few weeks now, and I've long since finished it, giving me plenty of time to reflect on what I liked and disliked about it.
Below, you'll find not a list of the game's problems (such a list would be a lot longer, that's for sure), but a list of the things about Too Human that made me want to quit playing the game and never return to it.
The Camera Sucks
I don't care what Denis Dyack says. Too Human's camera is bad. There are times that you cannot clearly see the enemies or area in front of you, leaving you to guess what is going on. I'm all for dynamic cameras, but when the camera works against you, that's a significant problem. Too Human would have been better off giving camera control to the player.
When I Die, I Don't Want to Watch a 15-second Cut-Scene
In a game that is primarily about combat, you can expect to die often. One would think that the developer of a game with a lot of combat would realize this and make conscious design decisions to ensure that the downtime after losing an enemy encounter is minimal. Clearly, Silicon Knights doesn't understand that when you die -- whether it be by a single enemy, a horde of enemies or a menacing boss fight -- you're not "happy" about it. Generally, you want to get right back into the fray as soon as possible. The last thing that you want to do is watch an unskippable 15-second cut-scene. And, no, Dyack, the fact that I hate the Valkyrie revival scene is not because I "want to get back" into the game -- it's because the cut-scene is too long and boring.
The Combat is Mindless
Hold the analog stick in the direction of the enemy. That's it. For hours. And hours. And hours. It's about as unexciting as combat can be. Sure, you can throw the enemy into the air and then proceed to hold the analog stick in the direction of that enemy and beat it while in the air instead, but honestly, it's still mindless.
Enemies that Explode, Freeze You Upon Contact and Shoot **** At You While Hiding Behind Other Enemies
These enemy types are as frustrating as they come. The first and second types are similar in the sense that they make close-range combat a pain. The first type explodes after you kill it, and the second freezes you upon contact. Both of these enemies are poor design choices because they are in no way "challenging" -- rather they're just irritating. The exact same can be said about the third enemy kind, the enemies that hide on the other side of waves of enemies, shooting you with missiles and other projectiles. There's something fundamentally aggravating about being knocked down repeatedly by an enemy's projectiles while you either try to make your way towards the creature or fight the hordes of enemies protecting it. Admittedly, you can roll out of the way of the missiles, but then the constant rolling becomes annoying.
Baldur's Movement Speed
Exactly why does Baldur move so damn slow? Other than the occasional room here and there, Too Human's environments are repetitive and uninteresting, and the last thing I want to do is take a stroll through some forgettable corridors. While playing through the game, there were actually moments in which I wanted to say to my TV, "For crying out loud, Baldur, pick up the ******* pace." Somebody reading this article is thinking right about now, "Well, I don't see the problem with his movement speed. It's realistic." That response is moot. Too Human is not a game of realism. Just look at Baldur -- he's a cybernetic god. Shouldn't he move like one?
It's So Repetitive
Don't for a second try to justify Too Human's repetitive gameplay by tagging it as a dungeon crawler. Dungeon crawlers have online multiplayer that support more than two players. Too Human supports two-player online co-op, sure, but it's tacked-on and you can't experience any of the story. First and foremost, Too Human is a single-player RPG. And the underlying gameplay here is mundane. If you've experienced five minutes of Too Human, you've experienced everything the game has to offer. Playing the game for another 10 hours is pointless, unless you care about a cybernetic retelling of Norse mythology (I happen to, which is why I played through the whole game). But from a gameplay standpoint, the monotony is clear: watch jerky cut-scene, visit frozen and abandoned site, kill hundreds of enemies. Rinse and repeat.
The Ice Forest
If you haven't played through Too Human, then you won't know what "The Ice Forest" refers to. For all who have played through the game, though, the meaning is clear. The Ice Forest is the second level in the game, and it's by far the longest. For hours, you'll travel through area after area of indistinguishable environments, wondering when the copying and pasting will end. This whole write-up is subjective, but the following complaint is admittedly the most subjective thing on this page: I just don't like The Ice Forest. The level is bland and should have been half the length.
So, all things said and done, do I hate Too Human? Not really. But had this not been a Silicon Knights game and had I not been curious to see where the story would go, I would have stopped playing the game within the first hour.
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This is not a "Let's Hate on Too Human" post. I am writing this because I have genuinely wanted to verbalize some of the reasons that I seriously wanted to put the controller down while playing through Too Human and never pick it up again. The game has been out for a few weeks now, and I've long since finished it, giving me plenty of time to reflect on what I liked and disliked about it.
Below, you'll find not a list of the game's problems (such a list would be a lot longer, that's for sure), but a list of the things about Too Human that made me want to quit playing the game and never return to it.
The Camera Sucks
I don't care what Denis Dyack says. Too Human's camera is bad. There are times that you cannot clearly see the enemies or area in front of you, leaving you to guess what is going on. I'm all for dynamic cameras, but when the camera works against you, that's a significant problem. Too Human would have been better off giving camera control to the player.
When I Die, I Don't Want to Watch a 15-second Cut-Scene
In a game that is primarily about combat, you can expect to die often. One would think that the developer of a game with a lot of combat would realize this and make conscious design decisions to ensure that the downtime after losing an enemy encounter is minimal. Clearly, Silicon Knights doesn't understand that when you die -- whether it be by a single enemy, a horde of enemies or a menacing boss fight -- you're not "happy" about it. Generally, you want to get right back into the fray as soon as possible. The last thing that you want to do is watch an unskippable 15-second cut-scene. And, no, Dyack, the fact that I hate the Valkyrie revival scene is not because I "want to get back" into the game -- it's because the cut-scene is too long and boring.
The Combat is Mindless
Hold the analog stick in the direction of the enemy. That's it. For hours. And hours. And hours. It's about as unexciting as combat can be. Sure, you can throw the enemy into the air and then proceed to hold the analog stick in the direction of that enemy and beat it while in the air instead, but honestly, it's still mindless.
Enemies that Explode, Freeze You Upon Contact and Shoot **** At You While Hiding Behind Other Enemies
These enemy types are as frustrating as they come. The first and second types are similar in the sense that they make close-range combat a pain. The first type explodes after you kill it, and the second freezes you upon contact. Both of these enemies are poor design choices because they are in no way "challenging" -- rather they're just irritating. The exact same can be said about the third enemy kind, the enemies that hide on the other side of waves of enemies, shooting you with missiles and other projectiles. There's something fundamentally aggravating about being knocked down repeatedly by an enemy's projectiles while you either try to make your way towards the creature or fight the hordes of enemies protecting it. Admittedly, you can roll out of the way of the missiles, but then the constant rolling becomes annoying.
Baldur's Movement Speed
Exactly why does Baldur move so damn slow? Other than the occasional room here and there, Too Human's environments are repetitive and uninteresting, and the last thing I want to do is take a stroll through some forgettable corridors. While playing through the game, there were actually moments in which I wanted to say to my TV, "For crying out loud, Baldur, pick up the ******* pace." Somebody reading this article is thinking right about now, "Well, I don't see the problem with his movement speed. It's realistic." That response is moot. Too Human is not a game of realism. Just look at Baldur -- he's a cybernetic god. Shouldn't he move like one?
It's So Repetitive
Don't for a second try to justify Too Human's repetitive gameplay by tagging it as a dungeon crawler. Dungeon crawlers have online multiplayer that support more than two players. Too Human supports two-player online co-op, sure, but it's tacked-on and you can't experience any of the story. First and foremost, Too Human is a single-player RPG. And the underlying gameplay here is mundane. If you've experienced five minutes of Too Human, you've experienced everything the game has to offer. Playing the game for another 10 hours is pointless, unless you care about a cybernetic retelling of Norse mythology (I happen to, which is why I played through the whole game). But from a gameplay standpoint, the monotony is clear: watch jerky cut-scene, visit frozen and abandoned site, kill hundreds of enemies. Rinse and repeat.
The Ice Forest
If you haven't played through Too Human, then you won't know what "The Ice Forest" refers to. For all who have played through the game, though, the meaning is clear. The Ice Forest is the second level in the game, and it's by far the longest. For hours, you'll travel through area after area of indistinguishable environments, wondering when the copying and pasting will end. This whole write-up is subjective, but the following complaint is admittedly the most subjective thing on this page: I just don't like The Ice Forest. The level is bland and should have been half the length.
So, all things said and done, do I hate Too Human? Not really. But had this not been a Silicon Knights game and had I not been curious to see where the story would go, I would have stopped playing the game within the first hour.
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